Apr 29, 2002

Been reading about Kimberly's problems with her kids. Custody issues are a bitch. It's hard to tell where the judges will go; you are on equal footing in the courtroom unless the substantiated evidence proves otherwise. Even if they sympathize with you, they have to follow the law.

Fighting for your kids is hard. You have to be passionate, but not too much. Reasonable and willing to negotiate. Your ex is not the worst creature on earth - remember, you had kids with him, so what does that say about your judgment? These judges have seen it all, and they sum you up fast. But stupid, they're not.

My ex once got busted because he wore the wrong t-shirt to court. A brand-new t-shirt advertising a whale watch in New England. The judge remarked how nice it was and casually asked him where he got it. He proceeded to tell her about his trip, about taking someone else's child, about how much she loved whales - all the while thinking what a good guy it made him seem.

The hunter sets the trap, covering it with pine needles.

Then she asked him how much the trip cost.

Snap. The mechanism is spring. The animal senses the danger, but realizes it is too late to retreat.

Hesitantly, he gave her a figure. A ridiculously and suspiciously small figure. For an overnight trip to New England. For two. (Well, for obviously more than two - who's going to let their child go on vacation with their "friend" without them?) A figure that just happened to be the same amount as that of his weekly child support obligation. Which he wasn't paying. Now, explain to the judge again how you spent the money you should have been paying to your own child on someone else's kid?

Spring! The trap closes.

And I didn't have to say a word.

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